A broken Swan Read online

  I didn’t mean to stare that long, but a guy around my age looked up and caught me watching. I quickly dropped my eyes. I sat on the grass next to my dad’s grave and began humming a song.

  I closed my eyes wishing dad was next to me singing to me in his offbeat tempo. We both fall on the floor laughing because he never knew the words to any songs and then would change it up. I was so lost in a thought that I didn’t hear a person approach me from behind until he spoke.

  “Hello,” a deep voice behind me said.

  I jumped, stood up and turned around.

  It was the guy who caught me staring. He was the most gorgeous guy I’ve ever seen. Or really, the most gorgeous guy I really paid attention to. Dark wavy black hair, piercing blue eyes like the ocean, and he had a dimple on his left side of his smile. He stood a foot taller than me. He looked like a football player because his body looked fit in the black suit he was wearing. Or maybe a basketball player. He had to be over six feet. I stood like a dwarf at five feet only. He was at least a good ten feet away from me, which I was glad because if he was close, I’d have to crank my head just to look at him. But that will never happen, I told myself. This was probably the closest I would get to him. Why am I even thinking about getting close to him?

  To answer him, all I did was gave him a small smile. I slid my glasses up my nose and looked away. I wasn’t use to talking so much. I was use to listening.

  “Are you from around here?” he asked. His voice was even beautiful. It made my skin tingle. My heart began to beat fast. I nodded a yes. I started getting nervous. I couldn’t think of anything to say. It was a good thing he kept doing the talking.

  “Are you visiting family here?” he said as he pointed at the gravestones I stood next to. I nodded yes and said one word, “Parents.” Then I saw sympathy in his eyes. “I’m sorry; we just finished my grandfather’s service.” He nodded over to the empty chairs.

  I looked him in the eyes and stuttered quietly, “I’m .. I’m sorry about your grandfather. I..um.. really enjoyed our talks together.”

  “Ah, yes, Grandpa Paul was a talker. He enjoyed telling his stories. But I’m sure he did most of the talking,” he said with a smile, but I could see the sadness in his eyes that meant that he was really fond of his grandfather. To answer him, all I did was nod yes. And then his smile got even bigger. He was really a gorgeous guy. What was he doing here talking to me? He probably thought I was weird sitting here humming. And then I realized while I was thinking, he continued to stare at me. I blushed. I knew it was time for me to go, so I quickly said, “Um..have to go..bye.” And rushed off. I didn’t even wait for a reply.

  I jumped into my green Honda Civic and drove off. I never felt this way in my life. My palms were sweaty and heart felt like it was jumping out of my chest. I wish mom was here. I’d talk to her about this gorgeous guy. She would know what to say. She would tease me. Oh mom, how do I go on without you and dad?

  I know one thing. I probably will never see that guy again.

  Chapter 4

  It was two months into school. It was getting close to December. Halloween and Thanksgiving passed by quickly. Charlie didn’t have time to visit. He was busy with school. I didn’t have many classes left. I had enough credit to graduate from high school early. But Aunt Helen and Chelsea had argued stating, “Don’t you dare graduate early, you’re supposed to be walking that stage with me!” They won the argument. I was able to have the last period off and go to work after that.

  I worked at Pete’s Photo Place, or what I called 3P’s. The place was established before I was born. Most of the buildings in town were older. Even though it was small, business was always booming. I worked with Pete Palmer himself, who was this really nice old man who knew my mom. He always claimed he helped start her career. He was so devastated to learn about her death. He never gave me that pity stare, he understood. I started working for him when I turned 16. He said I had a knack for photography like my mom. He used to let mom use his dark room so he allowed me to use the room when I needed to as well. I worked with his grandson, Mark Palmer, who was in the same grade as me. He was a nice guy. He was kind of cute in a geek sort of way. He wore glasses too and had long dark blond hair that always covered his face. He had nice hazel eyes that he hid. He was tall. I could tell he ran because he had a nice body hidden behind baggy clothes. I guess it was an artistic thing. He was quiet like me, which was probably why we got along fine. We weren’t close friends, but I guess we were just friends. At school we’d wave hi to each other but that was it. Most of the time we were fine with silence. His passion wasn’t in photography, but in painting. He showed me a few of them. They were beautiful. I knew he would someday become famous. Pete was so proud of him. His mother was proud of him too. She came by sometimes to talk during her lunch break from the town diner. I could see her face beaming like a proud mother. He grew up in a one parent home. His father never bothered to stick around. Mark said someday when he has kids, he’d never leave them. I told him what my dad once told me, “Men who don’t own up to their responsibilities are not real men, they’re wimps.” Mark eyes glistened and thanked me, because he knew it was meant as a compliment. Although I did like Mark, it was just in a friendly way. I knew he had a crush on Chelsea. Whenever Chelsea came to visit me, he’d blush, drop things and stutter in his replies. Who could resist Chelsea, she was beautiful. Chelsea could be intimidating because she had this air of confidence, always so sure of herself. But she never noticed Mark. He wasn’t her type. Her type was jocks.

  The school bell rang and everyone rushed in to sit at the desk. First period was English. Mrs. Sinclair, our teacher was nice older lady with grey hair in a bun, always looking for her pencil when it was on the side of her ears. She was the lady who wore her reading glasses at the tip of her nose. She was a great teacher though, very passionate at what she does.

  As she began to speak, the door opened. There walked in Paul Ryan’s grandson, the gorgeous guy I spoke to at the cemetery. I quickly turned my face down, letting my hair hide me a little. I didn’t want him to recognize me.

  “Hi, sorry I’m late, I couldn’t find the class. I’m new, “he explained to Mrs. Sinclair. He handed her his paper and turned towards the class. All the girls gasped. He was a gorgeous male specimen. It was a good thing I sat in the last row. Also a good thing I sat behind Jason Hastings, a tall basketball player who played center for the team. He hid me very well.

  “That’s fine, Gabriel Ryan, welcome to Ithaca. Where did you move from?” Mrs. Sinclair asked.

  “I’m from New York, Dad decided to take over grandpa’s Ranch farm,” he stated. I guess he realized it was a small town and everyone probably would find out about them, so he offered up the information. It was over two months ago that I saw him and didn’t realize he wasn’t so far from where I lived. I shrugged it off because I realized that the only empty seat was next to me. Good thing there was no seat arrangements because next time I’ll be finding a different seat. Gabriel was his name. Gabriel, a name like the angel. But he’s not mine, a small voice within stated. As I was thinking, I realized he was walking down the aisle. I heard Mrs. Sinclair saying “There’s a seat right next to Odette. Please be seated so we can start class.”

  Please don’t recognize me, I thought to myself. I turned my face away some more as he sat down. I sat with my body turned away from him. I was glad that I was ambidextrous, thankful for learning the skill from dad. The class went on for half an hour. I could feel his eyes on the back of my head trying to figure me out. Darn my hair. I had to be easily recognizable. Mrs. Sinclair realized half way she forgot to take roll call. She started calling out names. I wouldn’t be too far down the list. Why was she doing roll call? Why did she have to be so forgetful?

  “Lisa Adams.” “Here,” she said. “Tom Banner….Henry Blithe….Karen Bundy…Odette Callaghan..” She said and looked at me. I raised my hand stating I was here. “Odette dear, please sit up, stop slouching.”

&nb
sp; I sat up immediately, which caused me to face forward, and then realized that Gabriel saw me. I quickly glanced over at him accidentally and caught his eyes. His ocean blue eyes that twinkled like the last time. He smiled with the dimple appearing on his left side of his mouth. We stared at each other, which seemed like a long time but only lasted for 5 seconds. I quickly looked away, hiding my face with my hair. He chuckled softly and whispered “Odette” like he was trying out my name. I blushed. I knew this class was going to be torture.

  As Mrs. Sinclair began to teach, I tried to pay attention, forcing myself to take notes. It was hard with a gorgeous guy sitting next to you. At the corner of my eye, I could tell he was watching me. Why was he watching me? Did I have something on my face? Did I have a smudge on my glasses? I self-consciously wanted to touch my face but forced myself to ignore it. Class was only an hour long. It felt like forever for the bell to ring. When it did, I got out of my chair so fast; I was the first one out of the door. I saw that the girls began to swarm Gabriel like animals, wanting a piece of him. I smiled at my own analogy thinking I wouldn’t mind of piece of him. I stopped abruptly, almost in the middle of the hallway. Yeah right, I thought and shrugged it off and kept on walking towards my next class. No chance a gorgeous guy like him would be interested in me. He was more of Chelsea’s type and Chelsea would be more of his type. I had my own issues to worry about with a guy in my life.

  Chelsea was right about one thing, this school year would be different. Today finished on normally. I was glad I didn’t have any more classes with Gabriel. He would prove to be too much of a distraction.

  Chapter 5

  I didn’t have to work today. So I went home after school. Aunt Helen was a stay at home mom. Uncle Robert didn’t mind and money was never an issue in the family. But she did write books for a living. She published a few books that sold in stores. They were mainly mystery crime novels. I read a few and they were good. She had a great imagination. Plus, it proved to be married to a man in Law Enforcement. Uncle Robert went from being a Sheriff to a detective. He and dad had the same worth ethics. So he getting promoted was what he deserved because he worked hard for it. Even though he was a full time detective, he still managed the ranch with a few foremen he hired to work for him.

  During school nights, Uncle Robert and Aunt Helen allowed us to go out. They gave us a curfew of 11:00 p.m., a curfew that they didn’t need to worry about me breaking because I never went out. I stayed home and worked on the ranch if I wasn’t working at 3P’s. Chelsea broke the curfew a couple of times, which resulted to her being grounded for a couple of days. She’d whined and complained how they were too strict and other kids her age had a later curfew. So Uncle Robert pushed it one hour later for her, midnight, being her new curfew. Kevin was sixteen now, so he was able to drive a bit. He went out a couple of times, but he always came home on time. If he wasn’t out, he would be with me, grooming the horses and pushing hay. He would talk to me about girls, asking me why girls were so confusing and why do they play games. All I would do is laugh and tell him, “Get a girl who doesn’t play games.” And then he would say “Where? This is Ithaca.” I would tell him that he was still young and his time would come. For right now, it was okay to just explore his options. And then he would come back and tell me, “Why don’t you ever explore your options Odette?”

  I never had an answer for him. I would just shrug and walk away. Why don’t I? I thought. I knew the answer. Why would anyone want a broken swan?

  Later that evening during dinner, Chelsea talked excitedly about the new family. She had met the mysterious Gabriel Ryan. She had history class with him.

  “He’s gorgeous Mom. He’s taller than me and he has these gorgeous blue eyes. He spoke to me and even his voice is sexy. He asked me for a piece of paper and I almost melted out of the chair,” she gushed. Ocean blue eyes, I wanted to point out.

  “That’s great honey. But there’s more to person than his looks. The Ryan’s are the family that moved in next door. His parent’s got tired of the city life and wanted the kids to settle into a smaller town. It’s too bad it was his last year in high school. Old Mr. Ryan left his ranch to his son, who moved out of here after high school. They’ve come visited a few times. I’m surprise you didn’t notice,” Aunt Helen pointed out.

  “They did! Why didn’t anyone tell me?!” exclaimed Chelsea. She was surprise he was this close to her than she thought. I was surprise that he had visited before.

  “Well honey, sometimes you can get caught up into your own life to notice things around you, “stated Uncle Robert as he chewed loudly on his food.

  “What does that mean?” she said as she narrowed her eyes at her dad giving him an evil look. Uncle Robert looked like he didn’t want to continue so Kevin answered for him.

  “He means that you can be self-absorbed, geek-wad,” Kevin said with his mouth still full of food.

  “Kevin, don’t talk with your mouth full honey,” said Aunt Helen.

  “I am not self-absorbed! I notice things around me. I’m not like Tracy Wells!” she pointed out trying to convince us. Tracy Wells was not a very nice girl. She was even more self-absorbed. But she was nothing like Chelsea. Chelsea got along well with people. Tracy Wells was one of the cruel chicks that tried to make a joke of me by talking down to me. That was something I cut off right away. I was not going to put up with that. I was the one to walk away. Never gave her the chance to laugh at me, which caused her to look stupid.

  “I’m not though, right Odette?” She asked frowning at me. I hate it when she does this to me. She knows I don’t lie. She knows I usually tell her the truth. But tonight, I decided to let her hear what she wanted to hear.

  “No.” was all I said. She smiled, “Anyhow, Gabriel has two other sisters in school with us. He has a twin, can you believe that?! She’s just as gorgeous as her brother. Her name is Gemma. The other sister is in the same grade as Kevin. Her name is Jayla. She’s just as pretty. I haven’t spoken to them, but I’m sure they’re cool. I can’t believe they live next door. I’m so excited. I have bragging rights with all the other girls in school.”

  My heart squeezed a little. I don’t know why I was feeling this way. But I knew that if Chelsea seemed to really like this guy, it meant he was off limits. Off limits, I laughed in my head. He was never “on limits”. I guess foolishly I was hoping for a change. But foolish thinking wouldn’t get me anywhere.

  “Well, I guess you’ll owe me a hug because I invited the Ryan family over here for dinner tomorrow night. I use to go to school with their dad, Jack. He, Uncle Simon and I use to hang out a lot. Jack decided to hit the city while both of us stayed behind to live here in Ithaca. Now Jack can do his practice here,” Uncle Robert answered. At the mention of my dad’s name, I smiled slightly. Uncle Robert smiled back.

  “Really! Oh my gosh, this is great! Now I have time to pick out the perfect outfit.” Chelsea jumped and hugged Uncle Robert and he rolled his eyes. “What does his dad do though?” she asked with a frown.

  “He’s a lawyer, like Uncle Simon. But he was busier since he lived in the city. He was demanded more. That’s why we never met him and his family. Now since his dad died and left his ranch to him, he has a reason to slow his pace down,” He stated. A lawyer like dad? I remember dad mentioned a guy name Jack, whom he went to visit whenever he went into the city. But dad tried not to talk about work whenever he was with me and mom. Maybe mom and dad knew both of them. I went to the city with them a couple of times. But it was family weekends, so it was just the three of us. He always said the two of us were enough in his life for company. I wonder why I never met this family. I shrugged it off. He must’ve had his reasons.

  “Odette, have you met any of the Ryan’s at school? Kevin, have you?” asked Aunt Helen.

  “No, I haven’t met the girls. I can’t wait though,” Kevin said moving his eyebrows up and down mischievously and winked at me. I grinned at him and continued to chew on my food.

  I took a
sip of my water and swallowed before answering, ‘Gabriel’s in my English class,” I answered.

  “Oh my gosh Odette, isn’t he gorgeous, he should’ve been a model!” Chelsea gushed even more.

  I thought about it for a moment before I shrugged. “He’s OK,” I responded. Uncle Robert and Kevin both laughed. But he was more than OK. I agree with Chelsea. But I didn’t want to say it out loud.

  Dinner went on. As usual, I helped Aunt Helen clean up and thanked her for dinner. I’d ask her how her day was and she always had a lot to say. She’d always hug me when she was done and tell me “You’re my stress reliever Odette, I love you.” And I’d tell her I love her too. She knows I’m not great at expressing my feelings.

  At night I sometimes lie in bed and imagine my dad coming into my room, kissing my forehead and whispering goodnight. No matter how late he would come home, he always managed to do that. Sometimes before bed, my mom would braid my hair because she knew how wild it could get. She’d always tell me “Odette, never cut your hair. It is too beautiful.” And I never did. I trimmed it but I kept it long in her memory. It was part of her, a part that I never wanted to lose. Aunt Helen offered to cut it but I always refused. I think she understood after a while. So she stopped asking.